Miscarriage Memories Story

I was 14 weeks pregnant when I found out my baby had died. Even though I was lucky enough to have a doctor, staff at the hospital, mortuary, and family that understood how devastating this loss was to me – I still felt alone. I was pregnant, then suddenly, I wasn’t. I was going to have four kids, now I have three. Leaving the hospital empty-handed was one of the most painful things I’ve ever experienced. But even more painful were the weeks that followed when I felt lost and alone and haunted by memories of how the baby looked in the ultrasound picture right before the D&C. I had seen it only two weeks before moving around – the doctor said it was waving at me – then it was so still. Even knowing it had died, I desperately wanted to remember how it looked, so peaceful, curled up like half of a heart . . . .

Searching for Something

Although friends and family tried to be supportive, it became clear that after a week or so, I was expected to “get over it”. I began searching for some type of keepsake that would honor my baby, both to keep his memory alive in my heart, and to remind myself and others that the grief I was feeling was a perfectly valid and normal reaction to the loss I experienced.

Creating a Product

When I couldn’t find what I was looking for, I took my ultrasound picture, drew a heart around it and found what I’d been seeking. I found a company that was able to take my drawing and create a beautiful charm.

Conclusion

It is a very strange thing that a business plan was formed based on my loss, but the more I think about it, the more it seems like a fitting tribute. My baby was a gift. His life had purpose. He was conceived for a reason. I wanted to find something to keep his memory real – and if I can help others during this painful time I will have accomplished my goal of finding a purpose for his brief life.

Please contact miscarriagememories@yahoo.com with questions or comments.

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